Scents, rings and cats

Make no mistake, I love cats.  They are low maintenance, pretty, social, and very pet-able.  But cats, like perfume/cologne and rings, can seriously impair your dating life.

The problem with rings is that in addition to being jewelery, they are a symbol of marriage.  I have two nice rings - one I made myself out of silver (third attempt - first two were not acceptable), the other a tasteful (no gem) gold college graduation ring.   I like the way they look, but any ring can get mistaken for a wedding rings.  Worse, while Americans traditionally wear the wedding ring on the left hand, many other countries use the right hand (Greece, Russia, Spain, India among many others).  So even if I never put the ring on my left hand, some people may still misinterpret it.   Frankly, it is simply not a good idea for anyone, male or female, to wear any ring on either hand while they are trying to get a date.

Scents are worse.  Unfortunately, as you age, your senses start to fail.  Some go deaf, some need reading glasses, and some can't smell anything.   This explains why every once in a while you will come across an older person reeking as if they bathed in perfume/cologne.  But just as some people lose their sense of smell as they age, other people are blessed with a particularly accurate sense of smell.  Additionally, some people like smells that others dislike.  Frankly, no one ever decides to date someone because they smell nice, but I have rejected women because I disliked their perfume.  I am sure many women have similar problems with men that dunk their bodies in cologne. 

I dance tango, and over the past decade have become very good at it.  If I ask a woman to dance, I always dance a full set of three songs with her,  no matter how bad a dancer she is.  Pretty much the only reason I ever stop before the set is over, is if she reeks of perfume.  Perfume and cologne are not a good idea if you are trying to get a date (or dance with me, for that matter).

I have dated women with cats - one of them is still a great friend of mine.  But it was difficult.  I don't think I ever slept at her place.  There are lots of reasons to have pets, particularly when you are single.  Being single can be very lonely and a pet's unconditional love can keep you sane. Pets love us better than we love ourselves, better than we deserve, better than we can hope to be loved by anyone else.  Pets spoil us, which is why we spoil them right back.  Cats are much lower maintenance than dogs, making dating easier for you, but unfortunately they also make it harder for people to date you.

I, like 10% -30% (estimates vary) of the population, am allergic to cats.  While some people are allergic to dogs, it is a much lower percentage - about half as many.    Before you decide to get a cat, you need to seriously consider how it will affect your dating life.  Would you be willing to give the pet up?   Are you willing to simply not date men/women that are allergic to your pet?  Would you force your date to live with the problem?  Of course, this issue is less important if you are not looking for a long term relationship.

For someone seriously looking to get a long term relationship, you need to ask yourself if these choices are worth it.   It makes zero sense to were perfume/cologne or rings before a 3rd date.  After a 3rd date, they should like you enough to ask you about the ring or to not wear the scent.   While there are good reasons to get a cat, it can severely limit who you date, no matter how long you know the person.